Inquiring Minds Want to Know

So do I want Javi to be Alberto's dad....

That's a tough one to answer. In an ideal world, sure. In a real world, not so sure.

Javi and I met 4 and a half years ago. He was a drug rep that called on my office. We hit it off and quickly became friends -- but really only in the professional sense; but there was always a lot of banter. I developed a crush on him and boy did I wish he would reciprocate. But, Javi was an enigma. He seemed to like me but was just really hesitant to respond.

Here we are at Porcaos in December 2005. He would always sit next to me, except when I was dating this other guy and well, that was extremely uncomfortable. I still had a crush on Javi while dating someone else and there we were at Novecentos and I was just uncomfortable.

The banter got increasingly flirtatious. We enjoyed each other's company in these settings. And then one day, he helped me hang a lamp. Well, he hung the lamp, I just handed him the tools. And from that point on, we became "real" friends.

In the early days, Javi and I seemed to want the same things. We never officially dated, just tangoed around it. Always talking, laughing, having a good time and most importantly getting along really well.

For whatever reason, things never went to the next level; our paths started to take different directions. I had begun my adoption and was ready to settle down. He still seemed to have some oats to sow. We've always remained good friends, and I can count on him when I need a man's help. But I just don't think that he and I want the same things, not now anyway.

So, while we get along really well, have a good time, enjoy each other's company, always have great conversation, laugh a lot, live similar lifestyles, have similar values, really compliment one another well, and look cute together....I just don't know.

I guess after all the frogs I've kissed in my life, I've come to realize that I am not interested in the least in pursuing anyone or even making it "easy" for someone to be with me. If he wants me, he knows where I'm at and he can do the work. If he's not willing or able, that's okay. He's a great friend, terrific guy, and great with his tools.